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Change The Way You Ask A Question?

“There will be little rubs and disappointments everywhere, and we are all apt to expect too much; but then, if one scheme of happiness fails, human nature turns to another; if the first calculation is wrong, we make a second better; we will find comfort somewhere.” ~ Jane Austen.

As I post, it is late Sunday morning for yours truly. The hazy days are back again. Generally, people here are affected by the current hot and dry weather. Coupled with the massive open burning hotspots, the air quality has been recorded as unhealthy in several areas. Most people are choosing to remain indoors. While those who have to be outdoors and on the road, like it or otherwise, they will have to wear their surgical masks.

Have you ever made some bad choices that caused you unhappiness and wondered why that happened?

On the other hand, some people have a tendency to fight back or to disagree with any suggestion or recommendation, even if it is a positive proposal for them. I mean, even before they have a chance to consider or think about it.

You see, we are born with the ability to be happy. Like anger, excitement, boredom and so forth, happiness is a natural state. Everyone can be happy. Disagreeing is a form of defense. Happiness is not a matter of luck or belief. It is created by the way we think and respond. Thus, all that is required from us is to have regular and conscious effort to increase our happiness level.

The crux of the matter is, however happy or unhappy you are now, you can be happier, or a lot happier. Happiness is not just a pleasurable sensation. It is about how our mind and body guide us towards what is most rewarding for us. Indeed, there are some who are frightened to be happy. They worry once the feel good feeling fades away, they would feel worse. So every time they get happy, they stop. I reckon, they don’t have to do that. Do not let the past keep you down. Remember, we can alwas keep that happiness as we move to the next stage.

It’s Fathers Day today. So to all fathers, “Happy Father’s Day.” it is not easy being a father. I know what it is like. At a recent get together with my youngest daughter, she asked; “What is your target?” I looked at her, straight into her eyes and said; “At my age, I don’t have targets, i still have dreams, plenty of dreams and working hard on it.” I believe a positive outlook helps. It help us view obstacles as opportunities, stay motivated to achieve what we want in life and bounce back from our setbacks. I understand the way my youngest daughter directed her question at me. All I said later was, “Change the way you ask a question and you will be surprised how well it will work for you.” Finally, I gave her some examples and she seem to get it.

Have a great week every one !!!

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38 Comments

  1. chouxbear says:

    Michael, a positive outlook will help with so many things. My husband and I have recently had some major financial setback, mostly revolving around our vehicles and lawn equipment. Years ago, my reaction would have been to scream, cry or become depressed. Now, even though bad news hits me, I step back and realize that they are only things, they only require money to make them better again, and even though money is not easily had, the things that are important in my life are still intact. It’s not my kids or my husband that need fixing, just things. After having had a lifetime of disappointment from living with the knowledge that a person who should have been a very important influence in my life didn’t want to have anything to do with me, having a family that loves me and cares for me is THE MOST IMPORTANT thing in my life. That’s where I keep my perspective and my much more positive attitude.

    It’s easy to throw in the towel when things get rough, it’s harder to realize that it could be worse, and for someone else, it probably is. I am, at heart, an optimist, and when I start to get upset and frustrated, I remind myself of that, deal with my feelings and move on with a new sense of hope and purpose.

    Thank you for your posts – I really enjoy reading them.

    • Michael says:

      Thanks for sharing your experience with us. What an inspiring insight my friend. Have a great week and stay optimistic !!!

  2. Happy Father’s Day to you too, Michael! ๐Ÿ™‚ I’m past having targets as well… Let’s just get on and make the best of whatever comes our way!

    • Michael says:

      Hey Anthony, I am truly surprised. You look very young and handsome to me. ‘Happy Father’s Day and keep excelling my friend !!!

  3. Visionkeeper says:

    Have a wonderful and HAPPY fathers day Michael….Enjoy!!! VK

  4. willofheart says:

    Happy Father’s Day Michael…

  5. bibuji says:

    The conversation of you and your daughter made me smile. Happy Father Michael’s Day. Your daughter will be proud to say “My father has dreams.”

    • Michael says:

      My daughter is already working. Her job requires her to ensure every one is performing and meeting targets. But it was good, during the limited time we had on that occasion, i reckon I gave her a tip on being effective.

      • bibuji says:

        Oh my! I thought you were so young that you still have smaller children. Anyway glad to know you are loving each other. Please say hello to her.

        • Michael says:

          She is in her mid-twenties. Love my unagi set? For bento sets, my favorite is Unagi.

          • bibuji says:

            Oooo yes I liked your photo of unagi! You know what, my uncle is an excellent Unagi cook.

            • Michael says:

              Sometimes I even go to Jusco and get one for dinner and enjoying green tea, I mean those with fried rice to go along. Say “Konnichiwa” to everyone at home for me. Regards !!!

  6. Wayne Augden says:

    Michael, another very good post. I love your words of wisdom. You’ve inspired me, and given me an idea for a post of my own. Blessings to you and your family, Wayne

  7. eof737 says:

    Hope you had a โœฟโ™กโœฟHappy Father’s Day!

  8. stuartart says:

    Superbly profound advice – change how you ask a question. I’m going to be pondering this all day.๐Ÿ™‚

    • Michael says:

      What is your target?

      How am I going to help you to achieve your target?

      Regards !!!

      • stuartart says:

        My target is to help as many people as I can reach their full potential, inc myself. Initially by getting my book into as many hands as possible and then getting as many people as possible to enrol in the 90 Day Program.๐Ÿ™‚

        • Michael says:

          Thanks for the share Stuart.

          In my earlier comment, I outlined two different questions as an example.

          Perhaps you may like to define your target more specifically. Then, who will benefit most from your book and course. And, how can you effectively reach this group?

          • stuartart says:

            Yes, this is the bit I’ll be pondering all day because I’m struggling to drill down into who exactly would benefit most. Of course I could just pick a niche like midlife crisis and begin to reach out to people suffering in that way. That could take a long time and they may turn out to be a non responsive group. It’s tricky!! Any help would be appreciated.๐Ÿ™‚

  9. Bonnie says:

    Hope you had a wonderful Father’s Day, Michael!๐Ÿ™‚

    • Michael says:

      Thanks for the thought Bonnie. It was great. You have a wonderful week and filled with blessings. Regards !!!

  10. Coach Sue says:

    Glad to have you back Michael! A wonderful presentation in ho to ask a question.
    Sue Bock
    http://couragetoadventurecoaching.wordpress.com

  11. EllaDee says:

    Nice post… “it is not easy being a father” but it’s not something you can change๐Ÿ™‚ Only special people get daughters! Speaking of which, my Dad always said “if you ask a stupid question you get a stupid answer”. My variation is “don’t ask the question if you don’t want the answer”.

  12. StHaelRazor says:

    Nice job! Indeed, parenting never ends. I have found in my experience that the question is always the key to the answer, and if you change the key it will unlock another door. Thank you, Michael. Many blessings and a happy day to you. Zor’ra

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